Older Moms, Watch Your Back
Sorry, this isn’t a post about cougar moms. It’s about health. As an older mom (forty-seven), I couldn’t help but make the connection between two statistics released on the same day: one showing an increase in the birth rate of women over 40, and the other showing an increase in the number of older people having back surgery.
I had my kids 6 years apart, and the difference in what I was physically comfortable doing at thirty and forty was astounding. Kids want to be picked up, so we pick them up. But lifting a 30-pound toddler day after day is bound to create (or exacerbate) all kinds of aches and pains.
I started noticing my own back giving out and, hard as it was, started saying to my daughter “no, mommy can’t pick you up, you need to walk.” (And don’t get me started on the looks I’d get from other adults—friends and family–who thought I was being mean!)
If you’re wondering how this relates to sex, all I have to say is “not tonight dear I have a headache.” When taken literally, that sums up the way pain of any kind can kill your sex life. So this is my word of advice to all moms, but especially the over 40 crowd—listen to your body and don’t push yourself or ignore the signs of pain. Get help—both the medical kind and the practical kind (ask for people to help, empower your kids to be self-sufficient, find tools that will help you do everyday tasks). Your libido will thank you!
For further help, check out this site which offers practical sex tips for accommodating back and neck pain. Also, the Love Bumper is a helpful piece of sex furniture which can come in handy when trying to vary your sexual positions.