Moms in Babeland

Study Says: Non-Moms Are Sexually Happier

Reportedly the latest twin study out of Northwestern shows that in comparing twins, the ones without kids are sexually happier.

I knew it. Based on my study (n=1), I was sexually happier before I had a kid. I wasn’t over-all happier, but sex-wise, you bet! In fact, women who don’t have kids can make having great sex their main project. I did, and I know lots of non-moms who do.

But while they can linger in bed and spend hours searching for their G (& H, I, J & K) spots, we Moms have to make what little time we have count.

I’m not bitter about this (it’s not like I became a parent by accident), but it does require real effort on my part to make the time. Between working, playing with my son, and cleaning up, by the end of the day I wanna veg out, not vag out.

So sex has become a little akin to exercise: I never have the time and before I get going I usually feel more like watching of Lost on TV than getting lost in love. And like exercise, once I get into it, I love it. And when it’s over I make all kinds of commitments about how I will do it more, make the time etc. etc.

So in order to help boost our results next time they survey moms about sex, here are a few tips:

  • Make time for sex (orthodox Jews do it every Friday, why don’t we take a page from that book?)
  • Saturday morning cartoons are good for keeping kids busy in their way while we get busy in ours.
  • Make a space for sex: if your bed is co-opted by co-sleeping, make another room your go-to make out room, don’t wait for your cuddle cub to be out of the house- that makes for long dry spells.
  • On your next date, skip the fancy dinner and spend the money on a hotel.
  • Set sex goals–how about a sticker chart? Get 10 stickers in a month and treat yourself to something you really want- like how ’bout a new sex toy? You’ve earned it!

Related posts:

  1. Sexual Health Study for New Moms
  2. What Moms Want Their Partners to Know: There Really Is a Connection Between Getting the Kitchen Clean and Getting Nookie
  3. What Our Moms Taught Us About Sex

topics: Desire, Self-Image


6 Responses to “Study Says: Non-Moms Are Sexually Happier”

  1. Nanny says:

    I disagree, I think I’m just as sexually happy now as I was then. While we don’t have as much sex, it’s more quality time.

  2. rachel says:

    That’s good to hear. I do appreciate the sex (especially the GREAT sex) I have now. I don’t take it for granted.

  3. Dani_Zaz says:

    This is probably especially true for mom of young children. Nothing spoils the mood more than a yell for Mama while you are trying to get your groove on.

  4. [...] First up this weekend: Sex…. A study says women are sexually happier before they become moms — yeah, I bet! Not exactly a shocker. But here are some tips on making time for sex from women who make it a priority. — Moms in Babeland [...]

  5. Shannon says:

    I know that having a child as young as I did left me open to have a great sex life post child. It was definitely hard when my son was younger and my ex and I were working opposite schedules, but, that meant that Saturday nights were always devoted to sex because we were excited to just have time with each other. Now I know that bedtime is a blessing, quickies can be totally hot and satisfying, and when I do have time to linger in the sheets…I do. Sex post child has been exciting and fun from discovering that the shower is a great place to sneak some sex play in to taking full advantage to his sleepover nights.

  6. [...] However, according to a Moms in Babeland post, non-moms tend to be sexually happier. That doesn’t mean you can’t be a sexually happy [...]

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