Sex Ed: From One Generation to the Next
I love and respect my mom for being awesome, open, and much more of a free spirit than my dad. But when I try to think about what she taught me about sex I draw a blank. The way I remember it, I was pretty much snooping and educating myself on whatever I found laying around. I still find Playboy magazine completely nostalgic and I remember the Joy of Sex book on my parents’ shelf. I remember it was actually my dad who sat my sister and I down and literally told us about how birds and bees fertilize flowers…
Fast forward 23 years or so, to the moment I sit here and type. I just looked down into my hands and my daughter asked me what I was doing. I told her I had writer’s block and that I was supposed to be writing about something my mother taught me. She suggested: “good manners?”
To which I replied: “Well, actually it’s about what my mom taught me about sex.” (If writing for this blog isn’t enough to broach the topic with her, I don’t know what is!) “… and that leads to the next question, of what I am teaching you.”
We chat for a minute to get past “yucky” and I ask: “so if you have a question about this stuff who do you think you would ask, me? or maybe your aunt or your friends at school?”
“probably you.” She answered.
“You know I will always give you good information,” I tell her.
She knows this, agrees and says: “Yes, it is good to have good information,” and goes back to her sewing.
A minute later, as I am typing again, she says: “Mom do you know how to sew?”
“Yeah” I reply, (and I think to myself, my mom DID teach me that…) The next thing I know she is trying to hand me a needle and thread and enlist me to help her with her new etsy project. “Ah can’t right now, Mommy’s working!”
I am brought back here typing about what I learned from my mom (about sex, not sewing or manners). I think it comes down to a couple of nuggets of wisdom that I do recall. First, about self control: “Krista you need to wear a bra under that shirt!” and also this one about going after what you want: “He’s just as nervous as you are, you might as well take the initiative.”
“K, thanks mom…”
I am going to attempt to leave a bit more of a mark on my daughter’s sex education, but I don’t think I am any worse off for using my curious brain and finding out on my own.
Other than that, I am at a loss as to what my mom taught me about sex. I’m pretty sure that Playboy belonged to my dad…